Poop in my Ear!

Just to lighten the mood a bit...
Last Saturday I am stranded at the Wal-Mart super center shopping for groceries and getting my van serviced... well I get the call from Steve and here's how it starts
"OK no one is hurt, we are both ok"
So I immediately start with the heart palpatations and stop dead in my tracks... WTC (what the crap)
So Steve goes on to tell me what exactly IS going on.. he says not to panic but Joshua has POOP in his ear... again WTC!!! He tells me that Joshua comes up to him and says "Daddy, I have poop in my ear!" He has brown stuff all over his hand and on his left ear, so Steve has to start the POP QUIZ to see what has happened and how Joshua got poop in his ear.. He takes him back into the bathroom and says... so what happened and of course he gets the classic "I DUNNO, I'M SORRY DADDY".. So Steve has to starts asking leading questions because he is getting no where fast with the I DUNNOs.. He asks him if he touched his poop in the potty and then touched his ear and he says "NO", so Steve asks if he wiped his bottom and then touched his ear, Joshua says "YES, I did it at school" well that can't be true because Friday night Joshua and I watched Holiday shows together and he layed on my lap with his left ear up and I was playing with his hair .. I would have noticed if there was POOP on his ear and for cripes sakes.. I would have smelled it don't you think?? Well so that didn't pan out.. so Steve goes on to tell me while I have this quirky smile slash disbelief smirk and standing in Wal-Mart in the detergent isle, that he is going to take Joshua to the emergency room to get his ear flushed out... Well like I said.. I was just freaked out because I didn't understand how he could have poop in his ear and it NOT smell like Poop.. oh yeah Steve said it didn't have a smell...forgot to tell you that... So after about 15 minutes of just walking aimlessly through the isles I decide to call my trusty sister, she will know what this is and what to do... So she says that maybe it is mud, can't be that, I say.. then she says what about plant dirt... now that is a possibility, but it would have a smell because of the food I have in there... ok so next option... maybe his ear ruptured and it is dried blood... WTC, this doesn't help me calm down any.. so she tells me all about Brody's ear and when it ruptured and I am thinking.. hmmm.. maybe that is it.. and she she says.. or maybe it is just EAR WAX.. duhhhh well that could be it but doesn't ear wax have a smell??? guess not cuz when Steve called me to tell me what the ER doc said, guess what it was.. EAR WAX!!! apparently it was building up in there and stuffed in due to allergies and it just broke free probably because he had gone swimming earlier that day and while under the water the pressure released it..
So there you have it.. Steve and I are the parents known to have the kid that once had POOP in his ear!!!! I guess that would be better than a toy car or pea or NEWS PAPERS packed in there for over a year... yeah that is another story for another time... (was not my kid!)

Our Christmas Angel

Well as most of you know Steve and I have been trying to conceive for about a year and 1/2 now. We finally did it on our own and just in time for Christmas.. what more could I ask for.. I got a nice BIG FAT POSITIVE HPT on Saturday 12/13/08 and immediately woke Steve up to tell him. We were so excited and just couldn't hardley contain ourselves.. I was shaking for about an hour and I actually kept the test on the cabinet just so I could keep seeing it. Within the course of the weekend I ended up taking 5 more test.. 2 which were digital and it was so great to see "PREGNANT" on that piece of plastic. Joshua told me on Friday 12/12/08 that he had a baby in his belly, well after I explained that only girls and mommies have babies in their tummies, he says "Mommy has a baby in her belly", I guess he knew before we did!!! Why spend money on HPTs, just ask your kid. He told me this again on Saturday after I tested, but I told him that it is Aunt Laura that has a baby in her belly.. just because we weren't ready to tell him yet.. KWIM???
Well Monday 12/15/08 rolls around and I had taken the day off to spend it with Joshua.. just mom and Joshua, sounds fun huh??.. Well I again felt the need to POAS (pee on a stick) so I had one more line test and one more digital test.. so I take the line test with FMU (first morning urine) and it comes up positive but very very faint and it kinda freaks me out because by now my levels should be skyrocking... so I stutter around for while and don't drink or eat anything and try to wait for another PEE to come on.. well it comes and I POAS the last digital one.. and my heart is beating a gazillion to nothing and all of a sudden it reads "NOT PREGNANT". I instantly start crying and wondering what is going on.. so I call the 800 number on the box and they apologize for it not working and are sending me another test for my troubles.. thanks CBE, you're the best.. so anyway.. I call the doctor's office to get an appt to have a blood test taken.. and then go about my day with Joshua.. we get out in the 16 degree weather and go get his picture taken with Santa, how fun is that.. Then off to the Hallmark store so Joshua can pick out his 2008 Orniment.. he pics out "Rocket" from Little Einsteins and of course it would have batteries and sound... it plays the Theme song.. you know.. "We're going on a trip in our favorite rocket ship, zooming though the skys, Little Einsteins...." .. ok so you get the point.. then we head down the road to get a box at the box store (yeah we really have one of those)... and I crack my head open (seems that way.. you know when you hit it and it feels like a ton of blood is just pouring down your spine from your opened cranium) so it really wasn't busted open just felt that way.. but I hit it on the trunk of the new car.. the wind blew it back down on my head after I reached in to get my box.. I swear I have had a headache since, probably a concusion.. who knows. So after we get the box, we head to TGIFriday's for some mac and cheese for Joshua and a sandwich for mom. Well it was there that I felt this weird twingy feeling in my lower abdomen... kinda like when AF (aunt flow) is about to come, so I went to the bath room and there was nothing so I gave a sigh of relief and washed up and went back to the table (and yes Joshua was with me the whole time, I didn't leave him at the table). After we eat and get home I have more twingies and have to totally pee because of it only being 17 degrees outside now (yeah we gained one degree, it was time for the Bermuda shorts and tank tops) so in the bathroom I go and there was a bit of pinkish staining on my TP (toilet paper)... I instantly start freaking and I call Steve.. he calms me down and tells me not to jump to any conclusions until I have seen the doc.. 2:30pm finally rolls around and I go to the doctor's office.. they do a pregnancy test and it comes up positive but really really faint, they take blood to get my beta and other hormone levels. She does a pelvic exam and says that there is a lot of brown blood in there but a good note, my cervix is closed tight. She puts me on semi-bed rest and says "If you are going to misscarry there really isn't anything we can do about it honey, but think positive and we will see what your results say" So we leave and from then on I have this overwhelming terrible feeling, I lay around all night and then go to bed. Wake up today 12/16/08 and go potty.. well no cramping, no pain, no nothing.. nothing but lots and lots of dark blood, sorry this is gonna be TMI but it is my blog I can say what I want.. so next there is this long thick string hanging down and I almost pass out, I calmly ask Joshua to bring the phone to me and I call Steve who is on his way to work. I tell him that I just lost the baby and he asks if I am sure and I tell him I am pretty darn sure.. so he says he is turning around and should be here shortly. Well I look back down and the sting is now in the potty and has a little bitty clump on the end same dark purple color and all. So I get up and I can't even flush the toilet, I am just empty inside, hollow.....
I go turn on cartoons for Joshua and then go to bed and just stair into the walls ... Steve gets back and comforts me, he is such the best Husband in the world.. we go on with the day, I cry a few times and then try wrapping gifts to make the time pass while waiting for the doctor's to call, yes I left messages for my reg doctor, my ob/gyn and my fertility doctor. I finally get a call back from my reg doctor and the test results are "INCONCLUSIVE" WTF.. so they say I have to come in again on Friday to test again.. arrghhh... well then my ob/gyn calls and asks what is going on.. I tell her and she says "Yeah it sounds like you misscarried..and as heartbreaking as it is, it is a good sign" again I am empty and just sit there quietly.. she goes on "This means that you can get pregnant, egg and sperm can meet and do the job" .. so anyway after the semi-Pep talk she tells me my test results that she did (oh yeah didn't tell you about that.. she had me go in yesterday at 4:30pm to do additional testing for blood type, progesterone levels and HCG levels).. so anyway.. my HCG level was 10 and my progesterone level was at 1.05.. both not good at all... my HCG level at that point should have been well in the thousands and my progesterone level was that of someone about to start their period. She said that it was all definite signs of losing the baby. My fertility doctor called later in the eveing to reassure me that it wasn't my fault that this happend and that it wasn't my low progesterone, it just wan't meant to be. So now onto the next stage of TTC (trying to conceive).
We are breaking for this cycle until I get a real (normal) period which should be 4 to 6 weeks and then I have to go along with the Clomid Challenge Test.. drugs.. JOY!!! so I guess that gives us a Christmas break to settle down from the excitement and heartbreaking news all while spending time with family. No promises I wont have a breakdown.
So Heres to Our Christmas Angel, may you rest in peace and know that we loved you the minute you were conceived. We never got to meet you, or hold your tiny hand or kiss your tiny head, but just know that there is always a special place in our hearts for you and you will always be remembered as Our Christmas Angel. Mommy and Daddy love you very much!!!

"The Birth Story" from the mouth of a 3 year old

3yr old: "I was in my mommy's belly when I was a baby, but not because she was eating me"
adult ?: "So what did you do while in mommy's belly?"
3yr old: "Nothing, it was dark in there"
adult ?: "What toys did you play with while in there?"
3yr old: "There weren't any toys in there"
adult ?: "Did you eat while you were in there?"
3yr old: "No, there wasn't any food in there"
adult ?: "Did you read any books while in there?"
3yr old: "No, there weren't any books in there"
dad ?: "Did anyone read any books to you while you were in there?"
3yr old: "No, I was in there all by myself"
mom: "Yes someone did, mommy and daddy read stories to you while you were in there!"
3yr old: "Oh"
adult ?: "How were your born?"
3yr old: "I just BOOMED out of her belly" Insert arm punching up in the air
adult ?: "so you just boomed out huh?"
3yr old: "Yeah I just BOOMED out" insert another arm punching up in the air motion

This is a conversation that we had with Joshua while in the van this past weekend while driving back from the resturant. My dear friend Paula and her husband Kevin were up visiting and not sure how we got on the subject of being pregnant or babies in bellies.. but Joshua picked up on the vibe some how and just out of the blue says "I was in my mommy's belly when I was a baby, but not because she was eating me" .. and of course this just intrigued the adults so we started asking questions. There were more questions but I can't remember them all, I just kinda hit on the good ones and the answers.. I was in shock I think, thinking.. "How in the world, would this kid come up with this stuff?" But he was as serious as a 3yr old could be while telling you a story about something.. and if you have ever been around a 3yr old telling a story, you know JUST HOW SERIOUS they get.
Joshua has been baffeling us for the past couple of weeks with things he is talking about.. it is "SUPER COOL" as he says, to hear the information that he has in that smart little brain of his.. I completely love it.. if we can get him at a good time Steve and I will try to video tape a conversation for you all.. Ms Haula and Uncle Jim (aka Paula and Kevin), not sure where the Jim came from were the only ones so far (outside of school) that has witnessed the "Joshua Conversations" but I would love for you all to see and hear some of them.. they are too cute.

The Appointment!

well the appointment went about as well as I thought it would.. I was really nervous and even had a lump in my throat... my BP was good though 114/68, I think, I figured it would be sky high. So anyway, the doc just went over our history, asked us a few questions and then gave us the spill on how the older you get the less your chances are of producing good healthy eggs, blah blah blah (insert scientific stuff here). Steve has to have some test too, but I wont go into detail I am sure you know. She (doc) asked how long it took us to conceive Joshua and I told her 9 months, she said that it could have just been pure luck that we got preggers with him but only tests will tell. So off to the exam room we go.. Steve shot out to the waiting area like a super sonic blast when they said they were gonna do an internal u/s LOL. The u/s showed that my uterine lining (ul) is good and thick like it is supposed to be and both of my ovaries were good in size and shape. So she sent us home with a "Plan of Action" for next cycle if for some reason we aren't preggo this time around. Steve is very hopeful since I got 3 Positive OPKs, I know weird!! I couldn't believe it CD14 it was super positive, then I was like 'What the heck, I'll test again" and low and behold CD15 same thing.. super positive, so again CD16 I decide again.. "What the heck" and test yet a 3rd time and WOW another super positive.. it was crazy.. like I was having a SUPER POSITIVE OPK fest or something...
So back t the "Plan of Action", if we are not preggo this cycle:
CD1: Call the nurse to advise AF showed
CD3: FSH (follicle stimulating hormone) level measurement & baseline u/s
CD5-9: Clomid 100mg
CD10: FSH level measurement
If my levels are HIGH, it means that my body is having to use a lot of hormone (fsh) to drive the ovary to produce an egg, causing fewer eggs that are fertilizable (yeah it's a word), and more difficulty achieving a pregnancy. If they are LOW, this is a sign that it doesn't take much fsh to stimulate the ovary to produce an egg, thus meaning we have a better chance of achieving a pregnancy.
Sooooo with all that mumbo jumbo said, we WAIT!!!!
If no pregnancy occurs after the Clomid Challenge Test (sounds like a game show, I wonder if Pat Sajak would like to Host this game for me?) hmmm oh yeah back to the blog..
If no pregnancy occurs after the Clomid Challenge Test, we go back to the drawing board but with a more agressive approach (not sure what that means yet.. I guess I'll have to wait for the next book to be published to get the low down on that).
So there ya go folks.. The appointment has come and gone and I still have the lump in my throat what the crap is that all about???? I am not sleeping well and I can't quit eating .. not good this time of year!!! I am not motivated to do anything either... not sure what is going on with me.. I have an appt with my psychologist next week.. maybe she can figure it out.. we will see....
Ok I am out!!

Today's the Day

I am so stinkin nervous about today's appt, I even have a crick in my neck.. arrghh
I am prepared well paperwise at least.. mentally and emotionally I don't think I'll ever be prepared..
damn my neck hurts.. I guess I didn't sleep well last night, I didn't even go to bed until after 11 thinking that I was missing something that I had forgotten or missed doing this past weekend. I had to squeeze in dinner, grocery shopping, paying bills and getting things ready for the doc appt all in an evening after 8 hours of work... the store was crazy, I was thinking "Man I guess I am not the only one that missed grocery shopping this past weekend" then the check out chick said.. "yeah and it is the first of the month".. Sheesh, I didn't even think of that, I just know it was crazy hectic and you can't find Fat Free Sour Cream in the whole state of Oklahoma damit!!
I haven't even really started Christmas shopping, I got a few gifts out of the way but nothing major, I need to get my spreadsheet out and get to gettin. Also, no we do NOT have our Tree up or any decorations out.. I normally do that on TG weekend but we weren't home and this weekend I have a friend and her hubby coming up to visit.. so I guess the weekend before Christmas is good to get it all out huh? arrghhh BAH HUMBUG!!!! Katie McScrooge!!!!
Ok I think I am rambling now.. I better get back to work, I have tons of BLMBG (puke) orders to work on.. sigh!!!!!
Wish me luck and I will update after the appt!

Buck Shot!!

So today we were audited, you know the ISO 9001 thingy.. or UL Compliant thingy.. anyway they were auditing us to make sure we know what we are doing and have documented processes to show what we are doing... so they happen to come around to my desk and of course I get total test anxiety and just kinda freak out you know.. so here I am all stresses inside and of course Pete the Auditor is from New York (lives in TX but still from NY) and has a very thick NY'r accent. Well being that I have very COUNTRY EARS, this could pose a problem.. so Pete the auditor from NY starts his audit and something must have struck the internal auditor lady to say something about hunting season, not sure what it was that struck that thought but something did and that is where my story begins.
Pete the Auditor with his NY'r accent says "Oh I bet that would be a good way to get rid of the auditors" and of course me, with my country ears thinks he says "Get rid of these ORDERS" ... so what do I do, I open my big COUNTRY BUTT MOUTH and say "Yeah, we could use some Buck Shot and get THEM all at the same time!!" OMG.. so of course Auditor Pete gets this blank look on his face but then continues with the audit.. so he goes on and asks me questions and breaks in every once in a while with a personal story, you know to make is seem like the pressure isn't on me and stuff.. (didn't work by the way, I was still sweating like a coon wrapped in a wool blanket in Arkansas in July) but I noticed that every couple of minutes or so auditor Pete makes a statement about me THREATENING his life.. and of course I was still checked in the Luxory Suite at The Anxiety Hotel so not really getting it.. so then it is FINALLY over and auditor Pete tells me that I did a good job even though I threatened to shoot him with buck shot and he left..
Ok so that left me completely dumbfounded and I started working and it stayed on my mind and then I hit ENTER to get my order entered in to the system and BLAM!!!!! I had this super sonic, ultra awesome (in a bad way) thing just hit me.. and I scream to myself (if that is possible) "OMG!!!! HE SAID AUDITORS NOT ORDERS.. I JUST FREAKIN SAID THAT I WOULD USE BUCK SHOT TO GET RID OF ALL OF THE AUDITORS AT ONE TIME!!!!" So I bust up out of my chair in search of the Pete the auditor so I could try and explain right.... well he is no where to be found.. (probably filing a police report for the threat he just got) but I see one of my managers and say... "HEY if you see Pete the auditor, tell him that I misunderstood about the Buck Shot thing.. I thought he said ORDERS"... and of course not having the whole story, he just laughs at me and says "OK". Then I have to tell my group manager because he is at my desk asking how my audit went.. "headsmack" .. he just laughed and said.. "Well if we fail the audit we may just have to use your buck shot plan" "DOH"
So there it is ladies and gents.. the story of my life (for today at least)!!!

The WALL

Ok so after two painstaking days of moving me around the office they have finally given me a final resting place, same spot, cube is just 1/2 the size it was and it is a smidgen closer to the opening of the copy room .. Apparently that seems to be a problem for most of the people I work with.
So I am sitting on a conference call, yes I have a very exciting work life.. uuuhhh not, and all of a freakin sudden I get this loud BLAM and my whole cube shakes, pieces of cube come flying at my feet.. I freak the heck out pick up the screw that rolled by my shoe. Some idiot just ran over my outter cube wall.. I mean like it isn't even there.. I thought he actually drove his 4 Wheel Drive Diesel Eng, Mud Flap wearing Doolie (sp) into my cube wall but I guess it was just him.. so anyway.. now my outter wall has this stupid piece that just hangs there, can't reattach it because it is brokeass and I have no clue where that screw goes or if it even does.. hell it may have came from some other portion of my desk or cube as a result from the whole traumatic experince it just went through. Damn, there is a wall there.. can't you see it.. So this all happened yesterday morning.. and I think.. hmm that guy just must have been drunk or something.. well NO, not even close.. apparently my wall jumps out at people when they walk by because everyone and their mother walks by and they bump into it.. the whol reason for this re-size and move thing was to widen the walk ways between cube areas.. hmmm so we give them more space to walk through and they still HIT MY FLIPPIN CUBE WALL. doesn't make much since.. So me with my brilliant mind decides to put a Sign up that clearly and nicely says "CAUTION: This is a Real Wall!" Well apparently that opened me up for a few smart asses to come by and smack my wall and giggle at me.. well ok so I can deal with immature brats around here and go on about my biz.. ok think that was it.. not quite.. So today I am here early in the morning 7:30amish and it is all nice and quite, relaxing and I am really getting some work done.. I know I know.. don't pass out I do occassionally do my work... but anyway back to the WALL.. so as mentioned before.. I am all relaxing and working getting stuff done.. and all of a freakin sudden again.. here comes Sally BackPack walking around the corner and BLAM just hits my wall and keeps walking like a drunk pig at a Nine Inch Nails Concert in down town Chicago on a hot summers night... and I get so irritated.. like WTF can't you see my wall, can't you walk 2.1 inches further out to avoid hitting my WALL??? Ok so I get over that and continue to work.. I am on a roll why stop now right.. ok well then all of another freakin sudden BLAM, I look over and it is some other clueless chic with a bigass Paris Hilton silver purse that could hold a small horse with room for a bail of hay and some square dancers, she just keeps on walking.. like nothing happened..
So now I am really irritated and thinking "How can I fix this issue" since apparently it isn't going to fix itself as in like maybe they will actually walk around the wall next time.. so what can I do.. well I have no clue.. the wall is all shaky now and the strip is busted and I am at my wits end.. I am going to look for a Saftey Cone to put by it and some police caution tape to see if that brings the wall to someone's attention.. If they would let me I would spray paint it HOT PINK or BRIGHT YELLOW but then it would probably blind them and they would run over it again cuz they really couldn't see it then.. bad idea.. ok thinking, thinking...... ........ .......... ......................................................................
oh sorry I fell asleep.. Well I am out of ideas.. or never really came up with any.. I guess I'll see if I can get the cone and tape and see how that works.. or a bigass bandaid .. that is really what my WALL needs.. poor thing!!!!
Oh and now some smartass put a little note on my sign saying "I don't believe you" hmmmm Annette was that you.. you are in a mood today.. hmmmm well anyway.. if anyone has ideas, please submit them to me and I'll get VZB pay you for your efforts..
I may have to start a collection bucket "SAVE MY WALL"!!!
ok I am out

Date pushed out!

So I got a call from the fertility specialist's office the other day and they say they have to push my appointment date out to 12/02/08.. do they not realize that we are trying to have a baby in this century!!!! I guess I should have expected it since it was the week of Thanksgiving and all. So I guess our next step on the Baby Front is gonna be delayed a bit. Just wanted to give an update.. that is all I have on that.

On to the next step(s)!

Well just to catch you up on the "Car Thing" we didn't get a new door like they had mentioned earlier.. they just put in a new window and bent the door back to the frame.. kept getting Sarah Palin answers on the "how are you going to strengthen it back up" question.. "Oh we just have talented and experienced workers that know what they are doing" uuhh ok where do I sign.. whatever.. anyway we have our car back and it seems to be fine.. I guess if we are driving one day and all of a sudden the door falls off and I fall out hanging by the seatbelt.. we will prob take it back and complain then. Until then, we will just keep driving that car until it falls completely apart.
Now onto the "Baby Thing".. I got the dredded call from my ob/gyn doctor on Monday.. she asked if I got a Positive OPK.. and I told her that I wasn't 100% sure because it changed colors but it was slightly lighter than the control line and also it was a really thin line with most of the color being on the left edge.. she said that didn't sound too much like a positive to her either.. then she said.. "well the one follie you did have was a decent size but I am not sure it could have gotten big enough to do the job.. so I am referring you to the FERTILITY SPECIALIST" Like a horror movie or something.. this eerie noise came screetching behind.. I thought Freddy Kruger was in our house with a fake plastic knife looking for me... so anyway.. yep, you read that right.. I Katie P 36 years young have to go to a Fertility specialist... so tomorrow I head in to get som b/w done and find out if my thyroid and progesterone levels are still good and then on 11/24/08 I have my very first Fertility Specialist appt. Now of course she said "If you do find out you are preggers then just call and cancel your appt" Oh ok, will do, no prob.. like yeah I'm optimistic.. we COULD be preggers.. no big follies, no Ovulation and possibly low progesterone.. but OK, I'll keep a positive outlook on this.. I mean I only (at that time) had 13 days to wait to see if I really was preggers or not.. no big deal.. ok coming down from the high.. I just don't freakin think it happened this cycle.. why even bother worrying about it when I am 98% sure that we didn't get the JOB done this month???? So it is over, I am just working on questions and issues that I need to raise once at my Fertility Specialists appt on 11/24 and today that is only 17 days away. Got my Questions page started and I have checked into our insurance to see what is covered and what is not.. I have spoken with Steve to make sure we are on the same Page on this whole "LETS MAKE A BABY" ordeal and now I just wait! patiently I DON'T THINK so.. poor Steve has to listen to me for another 17 days "How aggressive should we be?, What other questions have I missed?, What will the name of our TLC show be called if we have a whole litter of kids, Jon and Kate plus 8 is taken.. and your name isn't Jon...??" I guess if we have quads we could be called Katie and Steaven's (like how you pronounce heaven) Family of 7.. how does that sound.. oh well I guess I have time to come up with that when the time comes..
Ok now on to the "Holiday Thing".. we may or may not go to AR for Thanksgiving.. since we only have the 2 days off plus the 2 weekend days.. but I bet we will... Steve knows he misses that Country Slang talking place and all those Southern Bells waitin for some chicken at the Git-N-Go... plus I want to see my family.. Then for Christmas we are going to IN to visit Steve's family, it will be a blast watching Joshua and Jackson playing together and opening gifts and fighting over toys and waking each other up during "NAP" time .. oh I can't wait.. now let me be honest with you.. at first I was a bit upset about leaving HOME for Christmas.. see I grew up as a military brat and we were never freakin home for Christmas.. and I swear that is why I never got the trampoline and the other outlandish stuff I asked for .. I mean what the crap.. Santa doesn't keep a GPS system on us to know that we are AR and not in AL or NM where we are supposed to be.. I just don't want Joshua to think that Santa will miss him because he isn't at home.. Steve finally talked some sense into me and I agreed, Thanks Steve now I am stuck at work during the Thanksgiving week and the ISO Auditors will be there and I will be the ONLY SUCKER there to be audited.. guess I better brush up on my ISO crap ehh??
I am actually quite excited about the holidays.. because maybe just maybe we can share some good news at Christmas time with everyone and who knows.. we may hear some good news from our very own LAURA ELIZABETH... Steve and I think she is keeping a secret from us.. we will see!!! Boy wouldnt' that be fun two preggers in the refridgerator at once!!! HOLY COW! That would be awesome though to be preggers at the same time... So anyway back to the "Holiday Thing" I am getting excited about getting gifts and wrapping them.. I think Joshua will be a little more into it this year, he has already given me a few ideas for things he wants from Santa and is patiently waiting for them too. So I gave my mom Hungry Hungry Hippo and will see aboutt he Thomas Track thing (price that is) don't want to hand that off if it is spensy and of course if it has Thomas' name on it I am willing to bet it will be spensy.. I can't wait to decorate the house and have it all smelling like cinnamon and hot chocolate .. yummy. Gotta get to planning on the GNO Christmas Party and get the names out for gifts.. yep Steve will have a job again this year getting that taken care of. Annette has made the decision on the "PLACE" now we gotta come up with the "INVITE LIST, DATE, TIME, & INVITES OUT" . Also I have to start on planning the Mom's weekend out that I want to do next spring.. oh the things I gotta do.. but you know.. I love doing those types of things.. they make me happy. I love to plan things like parties and get togethers and such.. so much fun!!!
Ok well I have taken up a bit of time and now I have to get back to work.. take care all and hope everyone has a wonderful Weekend!!!!
T-Town Rocks, I am OUT!!!

The Car!!!

So we go to the zoo for HallowZooween and have a blast, Joshua is great and he made out like a bandit on candy.. so the night comes to and end and we all heard out to the cars to get undressed and buckled in and head home right.. well that would be the idea plan... so we get to the car, open the door as the kid in the truck next to us says "Don't get on the swing, it will END you" uhhh ok, so I proceed to remove Joshua's Elephant costume and smart mom me.. I put his Spiderman Jammies under his costume earlier so we just have to buckle him up and head home.. ok not so easy.. I get the costume off, get him in the back seat to get in his chair.. then shut the front passenger side door like any normal person would do right... well it doesn't shut so I think crap the seat belt must be in it, I open it and try again.. same thing.. then I finally take a deep look at it and see this 2 inch gaping piece of my car door so Steve and I with our brilliant minds think.. oh since we are in the grass we must be on UNEVEN ground.. lets back up and then try again.. Uhhh NADA, same stinking thing... so it finally dawns on me.. OUR CAR HAS BEEN BROKEN INTO!!!!! Steve gets out to inspect and agrees.. some idiot apparently smart idiot if that is possible pried the top portion of our front passenger side door about 2 inches away from the car frame without breaking the window or even scratching the car.. one little spec of paint missing could have even been caused by a rock on the road... now since we never leave stuff in the car nothing was taken and nothing even looked moved or touched.. I mean come one.. a 2000 Pontiac Grand Am, what could we have had to offer.. so now we have a funky car door that we have to take to get fixed tomorrow.. fun times.
I am attaching some nice photo's of the GOODS.. enjoy!!!

Been MIA, sorry!

Sorry I have been MIA lately, I just haven't really been inspired to write.. sure there are plenty of things going on in my life but I didn't think to sit down and write about them.. but maybe that is why.. I was busy doing those things.. hmmm what a concept.. I can tell you that I have been eating Oreo cookies like they are going out of style and I got a super duper discount on them before the style left.. it did take me 2 weeks to eat a whole pack but OMG.. a whole package of Oreos all by myself?? I only gave Joshua 2 of them..and that was to bribe him into taking photos in his Halloween costume.. the things we do to get pics of our kids..
So anyway.. some friends and I went to the Staind concert last Friday.. man was that ever good.. Aaron Lewis is such a hottie.. and I just know he was singing directly to me.. it was like he and I were the only ones in the whole room... uh then I got smacked in the head by some dumbass kid's shoe.. ok Staind is ok hard but just like Phillip (guy that was in the friend pack) said.. IT WAS A BALLAD.. why in the hello would you be crowd surfing to a ballad??? So my other friends Annette and Karla (great gals, I love them to death) they are a lot shorter than I and for some odd reason they kept being on the side that the stupid Mosh Pit was on.. they were pushing and shoving the stupid heads back into the pit to get them off of all of us.. LOL they are funny gals.. two of the smallest girls out there and they were pushing those stinky sweaty guys back into their Neanderthal PIT to slam into each other and rub their sweaty bodies on each other.. hmmm wonder if they think of that way.. think they would continue to do it if they did??? So anyway.. Red (or otherwise known as R-E-DEAD) was awesome for a second time, Papa Roach.. totally cool.. loved the lead singer.. he was fun to watch.. then Seether.. lead singer had pink or read hair not sure but man does he have a voice!!!! Then of course the one and only STAIND came out... and talk about voices.. Aaron Lewis has the voice of a god!! He didn't play one of my all time favorites that's ok.. I forgive you Aaron! This time.. OK so that was Friday.. onto Saturday.. took Joshua to the pumpkin patch.. he had a lot of fun climbing all over the pumpkins and feeding the goats.. then after about an hour or so we left to return home.. then of course I am freaking tired from the night before so I decide to take a nap.. then Karla calls to say she is on her way.. I am like WHAT.. what time is it.. OMG so it was like time to be ready to go to the Jewelry party and I was still like so ASLEEP!!!! So I get up and do the super duper "Get yo ass ready in a quick way" dance and of course have to make Karla and Jadyn wait patiently while I finish up since I am not so super duper fast... so off we go to the party.. get there, eat great food and chit chat, buy some jewels and head over to Annette's house for some sprucing up.. and then off to the "Rocky Horror Picture Show" live performance... it was great, they changed it up a little this year and of course made tons of jokes about Sen./VP wanna be Sarah Palin... I laughed so hard I almost peed in my pants.. then after the show we were supposed to go out clubbing with the gang but, instead went to BELL TACO and home to eat a 4th meal at 11ish.. Now comes Sunday, yard work (cleaning leaves up) and house work and laundry.. I did manage to take Joshua to the park to try and get some pictures of him in his Halloween Costume.. (see Oreo's reference above).. Now onto Monday.. work up at the butt crack of dawn like normal work days.. but instead of going to work I went to the imaging center for an u/s.. I get there and all is well.. in the room she (tech) squirts the gump on my pelvic area and THEN asks.. "whatcha in here for?" so I say.. "to get my follies checked and my uterine lining checked" and she has this weird look on her face.. "uuuhhh we normally don't do that here, and if we do , we do the intravaginal u/s" so here I sit with my pants all rolled down and a towel stuck in them to protect them from the gump and she just STOPS... "ok have to change plans, I will leave for a sec, need you to empty your bladder and then everything from the waist down OFF. Here is a sheet to cover up with" and she is gone.. now I was totally relieved that she would let me go PEE since I had to drink 36oz of water before hand and NOT use the restroom.. but wasn't happy that I just got blobbed on the belly with the gump and now I have to get it YOU KNOW WHERE!!!! well anyway it happened, she did the u/s and it was over quickly thank goodness.. of course she couldn't tell me anything just that my doctor should call me with the results soon. And now it is Tuesday.. and I am tired so I guess I'll go get ready for bed... I hope to be back on here sooner than it took me this time..
Peace, Love and Financial Stability to ya all!!!
I'm OUT!

Hello, well I have been busy with LIFE the past few days and haven't been able to write. AF has left the bldg but she always likes to leave a small little gift for about 2 days after she is gone. So I have AF here for 3.5 days, then 1 day of nothing (really nothing), then that follows with about 2-3 days of BY (brown yuck) sorry for TMI, I just didn't think you would get the BY.. anyway.. so I am on CD5, 3rd day of Clomid 50mg and trying like hello to be optimistic. I have been eating yams like crazy.. but I am confused as the signs at the stores say "Yams and Sweet Potatoes are the same" but then I google it and it says they aren't and that in the US we mostly get Sweet Potatoes because we don't grow Yams here and we don't get shipments of them often. So again with the conflicting info out there.. I mean come on this is a freakin potatoe thingy... why all the confusion.. there are far more pressing issues than a potato thingy right? Why in the world would I need to stress out about if a Sweet Potato Yam are the same.. look at what is going on in the world today.. sheesh, I pick the craziest things to stress about.. So I have called all of the Homeopathic stores looking for Yam Flakes well WholeFoods used to carry them but no long does.. so they can special order it for me if I really want it.. hmmmm decisions decisions.. now.. I am gonna give you a homework assignment.. Why in the world would I be stressing about Yams and such? google it.. you will see. :) I am such a "Trickster" as Joshua calls it.. LOL
So this weekend was a bust.. nothing, did nothing.. grocery shopping doesn't count. I did go shopping yesterday at Kohls and The Garden Ridge.. had stuff in my cart and left with NOTHING. I had something bigger in my mind than spending money on things that I could really do with out.. I mean it wasn't anything like new undies or Milk.. it was JUST STUFF, cluttering STUFF, that I really don't need.. I mean apparently by all my posts you can clearly see that I really don't have room for STUFF right now.. I have enough on my mind and in my life .. and now that we have Yams in the mix I really have a full plate (no pun intended). The weather was beautiful this weekend and I stayed in the house most of the time watching FOOT BALL.. and no it wasn't watching with my husband and son.. I was in there alone.. I watched more foot ball the past few weekends than I have ever in my 36 years of life.. could it be the wager I have on the games or is it just that I like to watch guys in tight pants run around tackling each other and throwing a brown ball? hmmmm I'd be willing to bet it was the sweet mullah rather than the latter. Who knows ... so anyway.
I am at work now, yes in my grey walls of death.. in a much happier place than a few months ago but still at WORK.. who wants to be there???? uuuhhh anyone, Bueller? Ok so no one, including me.. but I am here.. got paid last week, got bene's, get to have social interaction with adults.. ok ok ok.. I can handle this.. it isn't the end of the world.
It is crazy when I come into the office.. I am like a little robot.. I come in, take my laptop out of my bag, plug it up to the docking station, put my purse and backpack in the drawer, unbusy my phone, log into all my screens and put them in the "Designer Fashion" on my screen, pull up my Internet Explorers on my laptop screen and TADA, the Day has begun! Now the rest of the day is not so uniform.. I have orders to work and I will get a pretty good start on them for a few hours and then BAMMMMM, either my AOADD happens or other WORK gets me distracted... so then work ends for the day and I just come in the next day and start it all over again.. I really do kinda live in that whole "Groundhog Day" movie thingy (may have mentioned this before).
Ok rambling.. gonna go.. gotta get started so I can get interupted and forget what I was doing.. laters

False Alarm!

Ok, well apparently I do NOT know how to count days or decide when AF starts.. ok so she started at 4:30pm yesterday.. not a heavy flow but just like normal.. oh crap she is here you know.. well I talk to the nurse today to get my script filled thinking that I need to start taking it tomorrow (CD3) but I guess I was wrong.. she said that you start counting CD1 when you have a good sized flow all day long.. so I guess that would be today.. so today is CD1 officially and I have my script on hand of Clomid 50mg to start taking on CD3 which will be Saturday 10/18.
So now it really all does BEGIN! Start your engines (did I spell that right?, looks weird)... anyway.. I have my little black calendar all marked up with this cycles THINGS TO DO!!!! I love doing that.. geeze what ever will I do when I finally do get preggers... I mean.. what no calendar updating.. no timed bd'g, no TWW, no POAS well unless I just want to for fun so I can see PREGNANT or two lines or a Plus sign just because I was tortured so much by getting NOT PREGNANT, one line or a MINUS sign for so long... maybe I can do that.. yeah, that is what I'll do.. oh crap.. nevermind.. the economy sucks too bad and I will need to save all my money for the baby.. oh well.. it did sound like a brilliant idea didn't it? Why yes darling.. it really did!
I like to talk to my self in the third person.. it is fun times... schweddy balls.. I love it I love it I love it.. I'M FIFTY, FIVE O, FIDDY... ok I am off my SNL kick.. sorry got side tracked..
I think my AOADD (Adult Onset Attention Deficit Disorder) has really gotten bad lately.. IDK, I'll have to ask my Person and she what she thinks.. she keeps me in line you know..
so what was I talking about.. hmmmm
OH YEAH, I remember.. so I got my meds, got my calendar updated and I am in the starting blocks ready to rock and roll. I am trying to stay positive, really I am.. I just have to keep my mind occupied and just do what it takes... Rah Rah Rah.. I have cheer myself on you know!!!
Well I am out of here.. I'll probably do more blogs to occupy (ewww another word that looks weird.. did I spell that one right?) my time... I'll catch you later taters!

My "Person"

Ok so this it totally not on the TTC train but I need a break from that crap anyway.. so anyone watch Grey's Anatomy? Well you know Christina and Meredith are each other's "Person" on that show... well I too have a "Person" ... she knows who she is so no need for names.. but I just want to talk about my "Person"
She is beautiful, very intelligent, witty, lovable and very independent. I have only known my Person for about 7 years or so.. but the friendship we have is probably deeper and better than a lot of my friendships from long ago. Don't get me wrong.. I have many many good friends that have been around most of my life.. I love each of them dearly.. But my Person knows me inside and out and helps me so much more than she thinks. Her strong will keeps me stong and helps me look out side the box on most things.
I just want to Thank you, my Person.. you are the best.. I am so glad that we met and you have let me into your life.
I hope everyone has their own Person to spend time with and lean on during hard times.. because I don't know what I would do without my Person.

Start of a New Cycle!!!

Well today around 4:30pm AF found me at work! I guess she isn't too particular where she finds you huh? Well I am optimistic about this cycle.. ok not really but trying like hello to be.. I will call my doc tomorrow to tell her the wonderful news so she can call in a script for me. And so begins the DRILL.. pick up meds, start the whole thing over again..
I am going to try and stay stong this time.. no getting down or feeling sorry for myself.. just go with the flow and see what happens in 30 days. apparently that is my cycle length, not 28 days like it has been for the past uuuhhhhh 15years or so... shoot back then I didn't even know how to count my cycle days.. the nasty things you learn while TTC. Isn't it funny, you think.. ok I am getting married to the man of my dreams and we are going to have a wonderful life with many beautiful babies and a nice house and spoiled pets.. well WTC (what the crap) happened.. I got the man, I have one very beautiful son, got the house, had the spoiled pet and miss her like crazy.. but notice I said babies.. as in more than one.. well and then you know what gets me.. and I apologize in advance if I offend anyone but I just gotta get it off my chest.. (wish it actually came off but anywho) I just grit my teeth and try to contain my self from blurting out profanities when I hear "Well we weren't really trying, it just happened" or "This is so not the time for this to happen but what can you do" > I mean we are all adults right.. we know how YOU GET PREGGO.. even though apparently it doesn't always work for all of us.. but for CRIPS sake quit having sex if you don't want babies.. it can happen.. it will happen if you don't want it for damn sure.. or so I have heard time and time again.. so anyway.. off that soap box..
So I guess to answer the question of who really won the WWF round 2 between AF and Clomid, AF, snuck in at the last moment with a sucka punch! She's pretty good at this WWF thing.. I may have to have Vinny go cut her car tires or bust her knee caps.. Where's the Soprana's when you need them..
Ok well dinner is almost done and the boys will be back soon. I hope to get back on here tonight.. no promises though..
T-Town Rocks, I am OUTTY

Common Abbreviations that I may use!

Here is a list of abbreviations that I may use while blogging about my trying to get preggers experience. Just thought this might be helpful for those that aren't up to speed on Katieisms or Trying To Conceive. If you still have questions, let me know and I'll explain.

AF – Aunt Flo (period)

BD – Baby Dance

BFN – Big Fat Negative (negative pregnancy test)

BFP – Big Fat Positive (positive pregnancy test)

O – Ovulation

OPK – Ovulation Prediction Kit

POAS - Pee on a stick (pregnancy test)

PG – Pregnancy

RE – Reproductive Endocronolgist (Fertility Specialist)

TMI – To Much Information

KWIM - Know What I Mean

There may be a few others that I use that I can't remember right now but like I said, if you have questions just let me know.
I'll try to post an actual Blog later.. I gotsta get ready for the jobby job!!!

Back again!

Ok so I didn't get back on during my calls but, to my defense I actually didn't have the call.. it isn't until tomorrow.. so there, take that!!

So, My hubby and I are currently going on our 15th month of TTC baby #2. It is driving me insane, it makes me crazy. I get my hopes up even though I continuily (is that a word) tell myself not to and then I see the BFN and get depressed and just want to stop trying all together. I have taken two rounds of Clomid 50mg and 3 rounds of Crinone 8% (progesterone booster) and still no baby to write home about. So most say it usually takes 3 cycles of Clomid well when AF shows I will be starting my 3rd round so it better happen damnit!!!
WWF between AF and Clomid
Round 1 goes to AF, dumb bitch did an illegal upper cut and knocked Clomid the hell out
Round 2 goes to AF, Clomid needs to start working out to P90X so it can kick some AF ass!!!
Round 3????? To Be Announced at a later date!
I guess we can't officially call Round 2 AF's win yet.. she hasn't showed her ugly head but I am getting emails and voice mails and snail mails from her so I know she is coming. I try to RETURN to sender and delete the vm's and have all of her em's sent to junkmail but she always seems to find me.. kinda like those Viagra emails.. you would think that the firewalls at work would realize that anything with VIAGRA on it is NOT work related material butttt nooo, ever since I took that stupid manditory Anti-Porn course at work I have been getting emails about Viagra or "GET ENLARGED AND IN CHARGE" or make your girl happy for once emails.. I mean come on.. does anyone out there REALLY read and/or click on those stupid emails links?????? Well I mean.. I know this one guy but he doesn't count.. LOL just teasing.. but I kinda wish I did know a guy that did that so I could bust his nutz for being stupid.. and laugh and point at him.. I guess I'll just have to find someone else to do that too. So anyway back to TTC... so here's the drill, now tell me how romantic this is!
CD3 through 7 take 1 50mg Clomid pill a day, CD11 or 12 go to the hospital and get an u/s to see if you have any follies (eggs) that are good size, CD12 start peeing on sticks to see when you Ovulate but can't be done in the morning.. you have to take them to work and do it during the day time for an accurate reading.. they fit nicely in your pants pockets.. No one will EVER suspect anything... ok enough of that.. so when you finally get a + OPK, you have to call the doctor's office to let them know, all the while you should be having sex with your hubby from CD10 to 18 and it is up to you to do it every night or every other night.. don't you love scheduled sex.. I mean.. there is nothing more romantic than that.. unless you consider two hippo's in a wet t-shirt contest romantic. on CD14 you start the progesterone suppositories.. yep you read that correctly, it isn't a pill you pop in your mouth or a patch you put on your butt, it is a suppository that goes in your YEN YANG... you do this until AF shows, I will spare you the gory details of the lovely things (one of their more flattering side effects).. but will tell you that one of the side effects is ENLARGMENT of the BREAST.. anyone that knows me, knows darn well that I DO NOT NEED HELP in that area... can't they make one that causes you to LOOSE some of your breast... ok just wishful thinking but still come one.. at least try to make a formula that does that... Ok so now that you all know what I go through every stinking month or have for the past 2 months.. don't you wish you were me???? any takers???? huh huh???
so anyway.. I know I know.. there are tons of women out there that have been trying for longer than me and have to do way worse things to try and acheive this daunting task... but this is about ME, JUST ME.. not them.. ME.. sorry that you gals are going through this.. and I wish nothing but the best for you .. but I am a selffish beotch, today especially, so I am just gonna whine and moan about what is happening to me..

Well it is 15mins past my bed time and I will be a GRUMPY 36 year old if I don't get my buns in bed..tata

The Beginning

This is the beginning of things that I need to say and get of my chest. I have tried using a journal that I actually manual write in but if you ever see it you would notice that there are months and even years in between the times I do write something. I started it a while ago when I was in a "Weird" place in my life. You know parents threatening to divorce, so you pack your shit and decide to move two states away with a guy you met a few months ago.. he makes you laugh and has money and likes to spend it on you.. you know that kinda thing.. but anyway.. so I started the journal then when things got really bad (you knew they would looking at the situation that I jumped into) he wasn't physically abusive but VERY controlling and I was in love with someone else so it really was just NOT the right thing to be doing at that time. I noted it quite often then and finally moved back home with my parents to finish college.. needless to say the journal was over looked for the next few years. Then I finished school got a good job, moved and started my "Adult Life" working, living with my boyfriend and paying real bills. Then bought a house and eventually got married and started trying to have a baby.. I started journalling again.. but of course that too lost steam after months of trying and no baby to write about.. started once again after we had our son and other things in our lives had changed... then again left for the birds .. well you can see my pattern.. not good with a journal.. so HERE I am.
I sit on a lot of conference calls at work so I have time to do this while pretending to listen.. it sure beats trying to remember to go home, dig in my drawer and try to write something down after all the daily chores and responsibilities that I have to do.
So now on to me.. I am a daughter, sister, wife, mom and corporate worker.. I work the normal 40hrs per week, come home cook dinner, eat with my family, spend quality time with our child, bathe him and put him down for the night, then it is time for the wife and Just Me time to kick in for the next 2 hours.. then it is sleepy time and guess what.. when I wake up it starts all over again (Ever see Ground Hog Day)!!!
Ok I will close for now, off my 1st conf call of the day and I have to actually work now.. I will be back later though.. conf calls from 12-4:30pm ewwwww!!!!